Have you ever followed someone in a dark, unfamiliar room? Well that's what my first night and the weeks prior to that felt like. Even as I was riding on the airplane, there were times when I had to ask myself what was I doing on a plane headed for New York. The question "what am I doing even came to mind a few times. I've done this before but for some reason this seemed completely different. When I got to the place where I was going to be living the weight of it all finally hit me. All of the questions and anxieties you could possibly think of began to rise up in my head.I got in a little late so there wasn't many people to talk to. As I began getting ready for bed I began to hear amongst all the shouting in my head "Fear not for I am with you". I slowly began to calm down as I heard this. Then this picture came to mind. I was in this dark room and I didn't know my way around but the other personWho I was following kept saying "I'm over here, this way. I know the way". I've done that in real life before, probably as a kid playing hide and go seek somewhere. I remember the feeling ; You're excited but scared all at the same time. Most from reasons for those feelings are because of  fear of the unknown.

 Will I make it?

What if I can't find the person I'm following?

What if I fall? What if someone sees me fall?

What next?

How am I supposed to do this? 

How come I'm the one who's in the dark faced with the unknown?  

For some of us, these are questions we ask everyday.

Ladies and gentlemen I have come to find, through all of the darkness that God IS HERE.

Some of you don't realize the depth of that. Remember the time Moses talks to God in Exodus? He said that he would not leave from the land they were in at that time unless God went with them. There are some places we can't go or would be miserable in unless God goes with us. It's always for our good, never for our shame. He provides rest for the journey, peace for turbulence, and restoration for the bruised and beaten.

This is a bright, strong word of encouragement for the dull and uneasy. God is here and he is not in a form I'd usually recogniz Him in, (because God is multi-faceted) but He is very much here. This is only the begining...

Wendy\0/

Hey Everyone! Wow, it's been WAY too long since I've made my last post. I figured I try to type blogs and everything else on xanga since I don't have a myspace. For those of you who don't know I do have a Facebook so let me know if you have one too so I could look for you. I will try my best to keep you all up to date on what's going on, even if it's just a few words sometimes. Feel free to read any of the old posts I have on here. To be honest I have been a little nervous as well excited about what awaits me in New York. The Holy Spirit has been reassuring me that he is with me and He is holding my hand. Psalm 46 talks about God being our very present help in trouble and Isaiah 41:10-16 has been my crutch for the last few weeks. God is good everyone, and it's up to us to see just how good He is.

 Wendy\0/

Hey guys I just sent out a support letter yesterday. This is how the end of the tour went for me. If you didn't get this letter or wish to become a supporter just let me know your e-mail address. The cost for me is stil $250 a month and I'm currently behind.I know I'm still trying to work on it, I just got back on campus this month.

Hello everyone! I know that this letter is a little late but I’m trying to do two things at one time. I’ll explain that later on in the letter. Well if you don’t know by now the tour is over and it is a very bittersweet feeling. I miss the traveling, and meeting new people. I don’t miss the waking up at 7:00a.m. just to go work. In retrospect It was the most amazing, fun-filled, action-packed, challenging 9 months of my life. I don’t think I would mind doing it again but right now I don’t think that that is what’s next.

             The last leg of the tour was pretty good although a bit challenging. After an amazing Battle Cry in San Francisco We left to go do an ATF in Norfolk, Virginia. That was our first cross-country trip and I can remember wanting to just jump off the bus and run away but I couldn’t. I think we went 4 days without showering (yuck). When we finished our event in Norfolk I began to come down with a slight cold and not only that but a lot of emotions that I had been holding in for a while began to seep out. I didn’t know what these emotions were from but I remember being frustrated most of the time and feeling like I just wanted to just lash out at someone. I then would feel angry and depressed and felt like crying. This lasted for a few days, and I began to keep my distance from the other teammates just so that I wouldn’t lash out at anyone. I tried to express myself to someone but couldn’t fully explain what was going on because I couldn’t really understand what was going on. This one girl on my team named Cassandra asked me if I had a journal when I told her I didn’t went to Wal-Mart and bought me my own journal with 2 purple pens and encouraged me to write. To this day that journal has helped me.  We got to Miami and I felt like I was a basket case. The weekend of the event I was on a emotional rollercoaster. I was still frustrated and realized when I talked I was very negative. I still tried to keep to myself. The evening before the event I  tried explaining to Cassandra how I felt and in an attempt  to explain I just broke down and cried. For what I didn’t know, but I cried and was just angry because I just couldn’t understand anything and I couldn’t understand myself. Venue workers passed us and one of them stopped and tried to make me feel better and this other one came by and prayed for me which was a blessing to know that they cared but I was still upset. I did my job that weekend and went home that night . The next morning I woke up and we got to the venue early so I went to my bunk on the bus and laid down. I don’t know where it came from but out of no where this memory came to my mind from my childhood. Little flashes of the event kept popping up in my head. I had forgotten all about it because it happened so long ago. It wasn’t a good memory. I think that that one memory of me caused the root of a lot of self-hatred I’d built up toward myself. All throughout the day that one memory kept coming up in my mind. I remember last year this lady prayed over me and after she prayed over me she told me that sometimes the Holy Spirit was going to bring healing to a lot of areas in my life and that sometimes He would work so deep in me I would began to start crying without knowing what it is He was working on. I didn’t know how to give that one incident up to Him but I chose to forgive the person involved and I’m still working on forgiving myself. The team spent Easter break on the road at my teammate Clark ‘s house and it was a lot of fun. We attended Rob Bell’s church for Easter Sunday which was an amazing experience, and later went over a staff member’s house for dinner. That Tuesday we all began to set up for the Detroit Battle Cry. I don’t know why but the Detroit Battle cry was a real eye-opener for me of the weight of what I did. I remember the first altar call that weekend being filled with TONS of people, just person after person after person. I realized that my job, my life was to turn people to Christ; that was what my life consisted of. As I watched the people walk down to the altar in my mind I could picture them in white robes and I was someone who ushered people into heaven. I was actually a camera grip but I felt that that was my job at the time. I just realized how much of an honor it was to be apart of something so big. The last few ATF events were held on the west cost which was pretty cool because the scenery is so cool there and I hardly ever go there. My last ATF was pretty good. It kind of hit me that it was my last event and it sort of didn’t. Load out was a bit hard for me, not because it was the last ATF load out but because I made a huge mistake and I felt like a failure at doing my job. Everything worked itself out though. We then had our last Battle Cry in Virginia which was a really good turn out. After a nice vacation /post production we went on our retreat to South Padre. It was a blessing. We stayed at the Holiday Inn Express and had debriefing in one of the rooms there. For our last night there we went to a place nearby that had a reserved room for us and there we had a banquet at a local restaurant and during the banquet they gave awards for three different categories; Leadership Example, Servant-Hearted and Team Vision. To my surprise I won the award for the team vision. Basically it meant that I was an example that with God all things are possible. I was so blessed by that. Later on that night we had fun just goofing around and having fun. When we left one of our Road Managers told us that one of the people who was serving us said that he was amazed at how we were Christian and still knew how to have fun. He also said that he used to go to church but he just got caught up in life. I think that that was so cool that in our time of relaxing and having fun it makes people think about God. We came back to campus the next day and did the Celebration Retreat and dominated the pool competition. After all the fun some of the third years left and some of them (including me) stayed. My summer ministry placement right now is the Summer Clinic. I really like this job. The people I work with are really laid back and nice. There aren’t a lot of people who come in but during camps week it can sometimes get pretty crowded. I do enjoy it, and the hours aren’t that bad either. So far the summer has been good.

            I know some of you may be wondering what the next step is for me. Well, I am currently applying for Metro Ministries in New York and hoping to live there until I attend college in the fall of next year. The program they have at Metro is a 4 month internship, and get this…It’s free! The only thing they mention after I applied is that their may be training expences for $150 so I would have to raise money before I go. It starts in September and ends in December. In The fall of next year I am planning to attend Medgar Evers college in New York for Mass Communications and Performing Arts. The college doesn’t have a dorm so if you could please pray that I could find a place to live that would be great. So I’m excited to finally be moving on.

            As you can see it’s been an amazing year and I have God to thank for that. I also want to thank you for supporting me. It is truly a blessing to have people support me in my dream of traveling around and telling people about Jesus and loving on them. It blesses me to know that there are people out there who are still willing to help me fulfill God’s calling on my life.  As this year quickly comes to an end The HA has been gracious enough to continue to partly scholarship me. The cost for me each month is still $250 and currently I am at -$868. Some friends and I have recently attempted to do a car wash but with crazy schedules and the constant rain it was a bit of a challenge so we  here at the internship. Any donation would be greatly appreciated. Thank you all very much for helping me and just for your time. I pray that God would bless you as much as you have been a blessing for me. Thank you for your faithfulness.

WendyJ  

Hey everyone! I know it's be a while since I've posted on this site. I've just been putting it off. The tour is finally over and it was AMAZING! It's a little bitterseet. I miss traveling and seeing new things and meeting new people, and I'm really going to miss my team. I don't miss the late hard worknig nights and early mornings.Well, for all of you who said that I was going to be a lifer I've got news for you... I'M LEAVING!!!!!! And I'm so excited. The next move is New York! I'm going to start out doing Metro Ministries with Bill Wilson and then later on next year I'm going to Medgar Evers. Please pray for me because I still need money for this year and I will need more for next year. I'm going to try to send out support letters soon so be looking out. Well that's all for now. I know it's not a lot but just letting you  all know that I'm still alive. Peace out!

Wendy

Church Pick-Up Lines

1.  Nice Bible.

2.  I would like to pray with you.

3.  Do you know Jesus, me too.

4.  God told me to come talk to you.

5.  I know a church where we could go and talk.

6.  How about a hug, sister?

7.  Do you need help carrying your Bible? It looks heavy.

8.  Christians don't shake hands, Christians gotta hug.

9.  Oh you are cold, Ecclesiastes 4:11.

10.  Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven?

11.  What are your plans for tonight? Feel like a Bible study?

12.  I am here for you.

13.  The word says "Give drink to those who are thirsty, and feed the hungry," how about dinner?

14.  You don't have an accountability partner? Me neither.

15.  You want to come over and watch the 10 commandments tonight?

16.  Is it a sin that you stole my heart?

17.  Would you happen to know a Christian woman that I could love with all my heart and wait on hand and foot?

18.  Do you believe in Divine appointment?

19.  Have you ever tried praying at a drive in movie before?

20.  Excuse me; I believe one of your ribs belongs to me.

21.  My friend told me to come and meet you; he said that you are a really nice person. I think you know him. Jesus, yeah, that's his name.

22.  You know they say that you have never really dated, until you have dated a Christian.

-Wendy